Saturday, January 10, 2009

Reconciliation With A Ghost?

Following my previous entry titled "Turmoil", I have had enough time to think things over by myself. I have learned from the past that unless I embraced the truth even if it hurts so much, I would never be able to find peace with myself and the people around me.

I have decided to be positive this once more by deciding to make amends with the past, live the present the best I can, and hope my future will be as bright as it can be. I have to keep in mind and say it to myself over and over again that it is not what we were before that matters, but what we are today. I cannot stop the past from surfacing, it is beyond my control whether I want it or not.

Eventhough I was quite unhappy that nobody said anything to me about it, I now understand that for them too, it was in the past, and there is no point to actually bring it up to create unnecessary pain, especially to me the innocent party. In fact, no one is guilty, even the internet :)

Thanks 'Chedut' for the brief and quiet conversation that we had. Thanks for giving me the time, space and understanding. Thanks for being there during one of my weakest moment. Thanks for bringing calmness to the turmoil I had in my heart.

5 comments:

cdason said...

"leave out all the rest" as Linkin Park says..

One Other ... said...

On the other hand, I think my life has changed forever, whether the Internet is to be blamed or not. :-( But embrace the outcome will perhaps make u understand things better. Nonetheless, one more thing to talk about over coffee huh...

Sumuk said...

cdason:
yea.. I will survive..

One Other:
I got you. For me, it did sway me for a moment, and I believe I might still be affected by it, but at least I am more prepared if there is more to come. It's a battle that I have to face on my own, cos there is no enough amount of comfort and assurance given can kill my insecurity kihkih. perempuan katakan..

Hamidah Mohamad said...

Its difficult to understand and contain matters involving the hearts and mind. You know best how you should handle those situations without getting yourself or anyone hurt in the process.Bury the past and work on your insecurities and move on.

Sumuk said...

hhmmm.. kak midahhh... ur always the wise one *teary eyed*

 
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